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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Incontinentia Buttocks' LiveJournal:

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Thursday, January 1st, 2015
12:00 am
Happy Fucking New Year 2015!
Happy New Year! hAPPY nEW yEAR! HaPpY NeW yEar!
Saturday, September 7th, 2013
11:58 pm
Stupid fucking people.
The whole point is that it didn't need a change because it was doing really well!

The government itself was implementing things that needed to be done such as infrastructure in the form of the NBN (costs can't be calculated accurately in advance, let's be real, it's an enormous project that will be expected to last for decades. Of course it's going to cost a lot!), disability funding (these people exist, their needs exist, we have to look after our people), education funding in the form of the Gonski reforms, an upcoming major overhaul of hospitals and health resources in general which will now probably be throttled, an acknowledgement of climate change and the dire need for a change in Industry's plundering of natural resources and their responsibility to the environment, a radical and long overdue acknowledgement of past wrongs done to our indigenous people. And we remain in the top 10 of growing economies worldwide.

These past two elections have been a joke because Labor have shat the bed so terribly with their leadership battles and petty power plays. They have squandered so much good will and yet still their actual deeds have meant so much more to the people than all the bullshit that is played up so much in the press. Shame on everyone who thought in terms of Abbott and Rudd in this election. This is not America! We don't vote for President here! Lefties need to speak up more, this shit should be countered at every opportunity.

*pant pant* Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.
Tuesday, September 3rd, 2013
10:38 pm
Four days before the election, 2013
I feel so disconnected from our countrymen/women who are being swept into the apparently enormous gates saying 'Follow Abbot' because Labor have really bad PR people. Our economy is sound. Infrastructure in the form of the NBN is being laid. The fact that corporations have carte blanche over prices without being regulated or indeed being asked to pay an equitable rate of tax or even to keep their labour force in their own country is completely ignored by Joe Dickhead who blames the carbon tax on their ever increasing utility bills! Rargh grarr etc.

Current Mood: anxious
Thursday, May 9th, 2013
11:27 pm
To Infinity....... and beyond!
So here's what's happening at the moment, my lovely journal that I'll post to now in a fit of verbosity and then cringe over later; I turn 46 in less than a month's time and it's high time I got started on my adult life, seeing as I have spawned and my boys are now 11 and 8 and are getting progressively more expensive and aware of what's happening in their immediate surroundings.

My income has been reduced by about $200 per fortnight due to changes in circumstance and it will continue to decline if I continue upon my current very non-committal path doing a job that I love 3 and a half days a week and suckling upon the teat of the taxpayer to make up for the shortfall. That teat has been wonderful and so necessary but it's time to give it up and start being an independent woman again. Gotta give my boys a role model, not just my nephew and niece an example of what happens if you're slack (I'm sure the boys would pick that up, too, which is something to be avoided).

So, to that end, I have enrolled in a Bachelor of Accounting through Open Universities. One unit per semester, no matter how dry, until I've got the thing done. I'm about a fifth of the way there due to my experience with half arsing my way through people's tax returns and BAS forms whilst working first for my dad as a tax consultant for ten years and then with two firms of accountants for 5 years, both of which I hated utterly mostly because I knew how unqualified I was. A fifth of the way in terms of knowing what I'm letting myself in for, not recognised credit, mind you. I really need to start things from scratch.

I can still act and draw and sing and write and be a fucking accountant. I don't have to be an arsehole accountant. I'll be cool creative accountant who's not all about the bottom line, man. Creative Accountant Woman! The teachers get away with it.

I'll have a decent enough income to allow me to pursue all kinds of things which come at a cost, such as text books and materials and freedom from the constant stress of financial burden.

Along with this must come a complete change of lifestyle. No more slothing on the verandah every single day for hours. Take Bert for a walk to the park with the boys. Mow the yard. Prune. Grow herbs and vegetables and fruit. I'm getting the fuck up, finally.

Let's hope I haven't left it for too long. Oh, and I'll let you know if it actually happens. Expect an update in a year or so. Here's fucking hoping it's a step up from the last 30 years. Fucking do it, woman!

Current Mood: awake
Sunday, July 22nd, 2012
4:27 am
Importance of Being Earnest - Bogan version
I'm currently performing as Lady Bracknell. Tonight, Algernon and I discussed the idea of a bogan version and here is my interpretation, based on my first scene:

(It's really kind of silly)Collapse )

Current Mood: recumbent
Saturday, June 2nd, 2012
12:41 am
Unhappy fucking birthday.
This is weepy and pathetic but it's my 45th birthday and I really feel like I'll never do anything spontaneous or fun ever again. Even my sister can't bear the thought of talking to me because I'm such a boring loser. I project a ring of pitifulness around me about a kilometre wide. I fucking suck. I should have died at 30.

Current Mood: crushed
Friday, May 20th, 2011
12:13 am
25 random things about me
1. Is going to earn money in some kind of creative field before she's 50
2. Is capable of great excess
3. Has more than once in her life peeled off all her toenails whilst watching tv
4. Would never have believed how much she could love being a mother 12 years ago
5. Finds being a mother very confusing sometimes
6. Is so shy that she resists making friends for fear of not being able to think of things to talk about
7. Is scared to death of getting up in front of a crowd without having lines to help her along
8. Has made many, many bad decisions
9. Is much funnier than this dry, terrible list would have you believe
10. Misses both her grandmothers more than words can say, particularly Grandma Stirling
11. Is going to attempt to lose at least 10kg before the end of the year
12. Loves her nephew and niece as much as her own kids, and worries about them as much
13. Is going to wash the dishes every day, or at least until the A team are old enough to take over
14. Loves her brothers and sister much more than she did when we were all kids
15. Likes tea much more than coffee but Coca Cola much more than either
16. Is no longer deathly afraid of maggots but is still very happy to never see one again
17. Had a panic attack at the dental clinic and shook like she was having a fit
18. Is afraid of heights but still regards her one and only hot air balloon ride as a highlight of her life
19. Said '2009